Gracefully Grayson

These chapters introduce Grayson, the protagonist, as well as some of the other characters, and set up the story’s main themes and plot points. In the opening paragraph, Grayson, the narrator, addresses an unnamed “you.” This may be interpreted as a direct address to the reader, which Polonsky may do to establish a connection with her audience and draw them in.

Grayson gives instructions on how to draw a princess abstractly so that the princess won’t be identified as such. This foreshadows Grayson’s struggle with her gender identity, and signals its significance to the narrative. This also serves to characterize her; Grayson’s appearance, just like her princess doodle’s, does not match her true identity—there is a gap between Self-Identity Versus Perception. Grayson is a transgender girl, though others are unaware of this. Because the novel is told in the first person, the story only uses gendered pronouns to refer to Grayson when other characters refer to her, which they do using male pronouns.

This section also sets up Grayson’s relationships with her teacher Finn, her family, and her classmates. Finn is the second character introduced in the story, which foreshadows his role as Grayson’s supportive mentor. When Finn asks a question about the Holocaust, Grayson interprets the question in a personal way. Her response characterizes her as a solitary, socially anxious young girl who isolates to protect herself. This foreshadows her difficulties forming relationships due to her fear of being rejected.

In the first chapter, Grayson mentions her late mother and draws a connection between their artistic tendencies. The symbolism of the Phoenix Painting is introduced, emphasizing Grayson’s connection with her mother. The rest of her family is introduced later; their interactions over dinner are depicted as generally caring, although Jack and Grayson’s conflictual relationship is hinted at. When Grayson’s grandmother Alice dies in Chapter 9, Grayson symbolically loses her last connection with her late mother. Her remaining link to her parents is through her uncle Evan, her father’s brother.

This section portrays Grayson’s discomfort with her appearance: She laments her resemblance to her male relatives and wishes she looked more like her mother and grandmother instead. Alice’s death enables Grayson to eventually reconnect with her parents’ memories through Lindy’s letters.

Grayson struggles with making friends. Although she isolates out of self-preservation, Grayson does not like being lonely. In the first chapter, Amelia is introduced as a shy but eager new student, which foreshadows her and Grayson’s budding friendship. Grayson often compares her to Emma, her only other friend who moved away in second grade:

I think, suddenly, of second grade, before Emma moved away, and of the table in the corner of the lunchroom where we always used to sit. I look at Amelia’s round face and dimpled cheeks.

I feel myself stepping out of my skin again. ‘Okay,’ I say. I have no control over myself. ‘I’ll meet you there’ (21).

Grayson repeatedly describes her efforts to befriend Amelia as a loss of control over her own body. This suggests that she craves social interaction despite her anxiety about being outed as a girl. She is willing to take that risk and open herself up to being rejected or ridiculed, which shows her strength and resilience. When Amelia asks about her parents, for instance, Grayson reassures herself: “I know I can’t avoid answering. This is what having friends means, I tell myself” (33).

Over the weeks during which she and Amelia get to know each other, Grayson initiates many of their interactions, such as by inviting Amelia to spend the day together or offering her hot chocolate. The thrift store, in particular, is a significant place for Grayson throughout the story, as she goes from buying boys’ clothes there on her own, to sharing it with Amelia, and finally to buying girls’ clothes for herself.